I'm abowt to go into hiding. Based on whut happened last yeer, it's gonna get REELY, REELY LOWD arownd midnite when the naybors try to blow up the nayborhood!
Yup, the naybor beans go crazy and burn lots and lots ov fire boomies and the safest place to be iz under a bed. I bin spending a LOT of time under the bed becuz sum beans can't wait fur the noo yeer and been making big bangs that send me running fur cover.
Momma sez the naybors are just burning thare hard erned green papers and duzzent see the sense in it. ME TOO! The noize hurts mine eers but Blackie and Bebe haff been thru this lots ov times and they don't get skeered. If a boom is reely lowd, Tiger gets skeered too and joins me under the bed.
Momma wuz finally done wiff her shopping so we spent Sunday wrapping purrsents.
But I don't fink she liked it too much when I layed down on the purrty paper she wuz cutting. And when she wuzzent looking, I took an empty plastic bag to play wiff. But she sed it wuzzent a safe toy and tooked it away frum me.
Which purrsent iz mine?
Momma just opened her e-mail and fownd this poem that her furrend sent to her:
A Christmas Poem
If under the Christmas Tree you see A poorly wrapped package from Me Remember that I have a cat and upon your box he has sat
If the ribbon on your package is tattered and the rest looks a little splattered Remember that I have a cat Who wore the bow on his head like a hat
If the paper on your package is shredded and the gifts inside are now dreaded Remember that I have a cat and let's just leave it at that
This weekend Buddy and Chloe had a sleepoffur at owr howse since thare Momma, Daddy and Grandpaw went to bizit thare Uncle in Hilo on the island of Hah-why-ee. We liff in Honolulu on the island of Oh-ah-hoo and they had to go on the big flying macheen fur thare bizit. Thare nice woofies (effen tho Chloe took offur the kitty bed in the liffing room.) But Buddy missed hiz Daddy and wuz sad.
Ut oh! Momma cawt me and putted the Santy hat on me like she did wiff Pumpkin!
And afta that, she putted a collar wiff bells on it on me!
She tried to put the collar on Pumpkin but he eskaped and runned away vury fast. She had to chase him to get the collar back since he mite haff burried it in the poop box and Momma had to giff it back to Aunty Leona. These items are frum Chloe's Chrissymouse wardrobe.
I get along well wiff ALL the poodins in this howse. Me and Tiger and Bebe hang owt all the time togethur. Nokitty fites wiff me (tho sumtimes Tiger and Bebe will haff a "diffrence ov opinyun".) And Blackie duzzn't mind sharing her cage wiff me. At leest she duzn't whap me or growl at me or hiss at me like she duz when Tiger comes close to her.
This is mine seree-us man cat expreshun. I'z finking vury hard abowt how to avoid getting cawt by the Santy hat that Momma borrowed from Aunty Leona. Yup, it's that time of yeer agin. We effun got a little tree in the liffing room. But the beans always try to put the Santy hat on the poodins. Maybe I'll try the bitey. Or hide under the bed.
I'm shoor glad that I'm not an owtside feral poodin any more. It's been vury windy and wet recently. Lots of trees and poles been blown down by the wind and if I wuz owtside, I wood haff been blown away!
When I wuz brawt in the howse, I lerned all abowt TOYS. I din't haff any toys when I wuz liffing in the hedge. This is me on the day I became an inside poodin after mine furst baff. The little mousie behind me skweeks when yu whack it and I still sumtimes play wiff it.
I liked to play wiff tinsil balls and krinkel balls too. Momma calls the krinkel balls mylar balls and they make crunchy sownds when yu pownce it.
I'm a ginger kitty and I live wiff Tiger and Sophie as well as Benson, the woofie who lives owtside. We effen got owr vury own fev-ver maker, Quincy. Mine kitty momma losted me on 10/29/05 when I wuz 2-weeks-old and then I came to live wiff mine noo Momma. She sed I'm spoiled but I'm just SPESHUL!